Just after putting a rough draft of my next column for the Reader together, about all the semi-automatics that have been walking through State Capitols recently, I received this cry from the gun wilderness:

Who has a fifty state pass to carry concealed guns into all fifty states? It’s a “certificate” Maybe like the one you’d get for graduating from Sunday School. Perhaps its the “paper terrorism” the Posse Comitatas committees of the 1990’s used to pass around. They claimed ownership of all sorts of public property. Rocky Mountain National Park? Its yours. They were a little like the minister certificates people bought through the mail to declare themselves tax exempt as preachers.

I can make it simpler. Print out this blog post. Its a free pass for any American or foreign traveler to carry with them into all fifty states. It certifies that the possessor of this blog post can ignore any local law which they find burdensome. Speed limits, seat belt buckling, parking meters? Ignore them. See something in a store you want? Just take it. Ownership is nine tenths of the law without this certificate but this paper takes care of that last tenth. What’s the best part of this offer? I won’t even charge you for your complete exemption from any state law. I’m pretty sure you will be expected to give your credit card number to Country wide Concealed for their all-state concealed-carry certificate.

Don’t say I never done nothin for you.

Trump Country! Ya gotta love it.

Oh, there is a state by state map Country wide sends the curious too. Check it out.

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