Yesterday, with six fleeting weeks to go in the campaign, I staged a little theatrical production of an imagined congressional candidate’s debate that I would love to be a part of. I’m frozen out of the debates because the rules for third party candidates requires them to poll 5 or 10% of the vote. Its possible that if an independent third party conducted such a poll I might very well register 5 or 10%. However, so far no properly sanctioned third party, like a newspaper, has bother with a poll.
So I wrote a little two part dialogue I imagined between the front runners. They’ve already called each other names. Oberstar has called Grams a liar and Grams has called Oberstar a “liberal elitest.” They both, especially Grams, have tried to out pro-life the other candidate and Grams tried to prove, apparently with faulty evidence, that Oberstar has not been visiting his District. I added some other things to the debate which I find objectionable like Jim’s porkbarrel and both Grams’s and Oberstar’s spending proclivities.
It was a loud snarling affair and my gagged face was supposed to be the punchline. One of my admirers, however, found the piece so unpleasant that he didn’t get to the punchline before turning it off. His better half who heard the caterwalling asked him what “that obnoxious thing” was.
I wish I had made my points with a little more finesse. Live and learn.
